Consequences of the Word
by Darkhours
Summary: "Thank you Castle." And suddenly a wave of guilt crashes over her. She listened to him break up with Gina and he doesn't know that she knows. She heard him. She heard him say *it.* Just a short thing I wrote from an old idea.


**Kind of like an alternate ending to Eavesdrop under thecastlefan101 account. Don't have to read that first just know that Beckett came in on the conversation earlier and heard Castle admit that he had feelings for her.**

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"I know what you would do if you won the lottery," he announced walking into her apartment.

"Yes by all means please come in." What is he doing here? How did he figure it out? "So what is your big insight into a financial decision that I will never have to make?"

"You would use the money to honor your mothers legacy." He said it so matter-of-factly that she couldn't even argue or deny it if she wanted to. He knows he's right and that must the reason why she's so hypnotized by him right now.

"On the way over here," he continued. "I spoke to the dean of your moms old law school about starting a scholarship in Johanna Beckett's name. One that would provide a full ride for a student planning to dedicate their lives to the legal system. The kind of people your mom championed. And with your blessing I'd like to host a fundraiser to fund it."

"You just can't stay out of my personal life can you?" She can't believe he's doing this. His bright smile left his face and she wanted to bring it back. "Thank you that's really sweet," she said smiling herself.

"We definitely have to invite the mayor..." She followed him to her dining room table and sat down next to him. She's listening as he's going on and on about what needs to happen for the fundraiser but is remaining quiet.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing it's just...I really appreciate this Castle." She smiled up at him an he held her gaze. "Why are you doing this? I never would've asked something like this of you."

"I know I just wanted to give you something. Something important. Something meaningful."

"Thank you Castle." And suddenly a wave of guilt crashes over her. She listened to him break up with Gina and he doesn't know that she knows. _Knows_. And sitting here next to him while he's smiling and offering her everything he has without speaking it makes her feel like she isn't good enough for him. He's too good of a person, too good of a man for someone like her.

But damn it if she doesn't wish that she could give herself to him, that she could have him. And even if she could she isn't ready. She isn't ready to come to the point in life where there are no more. Where it's devoid of anything new, where it's exhausted all that she knew. A finish line. Because what is life when you've gone through the whole play book, when you've tried every flavor, and when you've cut every corner? What's left? And if they were to cross that fucking line she drew for them she would bore him. She'd cheat or run or push him away. She isn't in the right state of mind, she isn't in a good time in her life to settle. And it hurts. It hurts like hell.

"Always. It's what partners do for each other."

No. It's what lovers do for each other.

"I..." Should she tell him? Should she tell him that she heard everything he said? But it's not as if it's anything new. She knew he liked her. Otherwise why is he sticking around? But it's just the fact that he doesn't know she knows. Knows as in confirmed. "It's getting late Castle. We should talk about this more tomorrow."

"You're not on shift."

She almost smiles. Almost. "Maybe we can get lunch?"

"Yeah. Yeah that's great." And he's beaming. Pure joy is just bubbling up out of him and coats her in more shame. She has to give him something. Anything other than nothing. "Motorcycle b-man coming back soon?"

"He's suppose to be dropping by sometime this hour, yeah."

He doesn't say anything else. Just stands from her dining room table.

They'll give and take an inch. Her move.

"Thanks again Castle."

"Always." Flutters in her chest.

She walks him to her front door and kisses him, daringly, lightly on the corner of his mouth before saying goodnight.

It's both the least and most she can do.

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